Ninian Clancy

[Ninian]

Name: Ninian Clancy
Nicknames: She mostly goes by "Nina" because most people don't know how to pronounce her name fully (Nin-ee-anne, by the way). She will also answer to Nin, or Nini.
Race: Human
Occupation: Librarian
Gender: Female
Skin Color: Caucasian - on the pale side
Age: 25
Clothing: For the most part she'll wear jeans and a small t-shirt when at home or out and about, but for work she will wear semi-smart clothes; normally brown or beige trousers with a pastel coloured top with some pretty embroidery details on it, topped off with some smart, yet comfy shoes.
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 110lb
Tattoos: None
Piercings: Her ears - she wears simple ear studs.
Jewellery: A jade stone necklace, a Lord of the Rings engraved bracelet and a flower ring.

Flower ring


Necklace


Lord of the Rings bracelet

Body Modifications: She has a scar on her abdomen from when her father attacked her in a drunken rage.

Hair
Length: Reaches a little higher than her mid-back.
Style: Ninian's hair normally falls in soft curls, and is very easy to style. She prefers to leave it curly, and sometimes has pink streaks in lower layers.
Color: Blonde

Facial Hair
Length: N/A
Style: N/A

Eyes
Color: Green
Oddities: N/A

Personality: Ninian is a very quiet girl, who gives off an intensely broody and sad aura: she walks with her head down and her shoulders slightly hunched and hardly ever makes eye contact with people. She'll make the effort at the library when someone asks her something, but for the most part she keeps herself to herself. When she does talk to others she's apt to get snappy or rude when she honestly doesn't mean to be. On more than one occasion she has managed to create somewhat of a rift between herself and her workmates because of her attitude. She never ever talks about her past so there's no way they would be able to excuse her behaviour because of it, though they do have their suspicions.

She tends to feel somewhat inferior, as if she's not got as much right to be somewhere as everyone else, merely because she is who she is. She wouldn't say she suffered from depression, just that her confidence and self-esteem were extremely low.

Nina is in heaven surrounded by so many books all day, and as such is always in a good mood at work, being more cheerful and social. Her workmates tend not to be on the receiving end of her snappy remarks and sarcasm, especially if they engage her in a conversation about something literary. Her love of books stems from her childhood, when she used to visit the local library to escape the troubles she had to face in her own home. She could lose herself in all these different worlds and follow fabulous characters on their perilous journeys, and for the short time she felt free from everything; free from her troubles. Sad to say, the characters in these books were her only friends, so she often felt very lonely. Even now she struggles to make friends simply because she doesn't know how.

The words "social" and "life" will probably never appear in the same sentence for Nina, as her idea of a great night is sat at home in her PJs, having a movie marathon or reading her favourite books. She's been asked to go out on the town with fellow librarians (well, they do have lives, yaknow), but she's always declined as politely as she can.

Weaknesses: Since she's a mortal, Ninian is susceptible to fatal illnesses and diseases. She's quite a frail young woman, so she wouldn't do very well if she was attacked (which is why she keeps the mace and knife with her).

Psychologically, Nina is still tortured by her childhood and suffers traumatic dreams in which she relives the day her father shot himself; though they have varying guises and appearances, it always boils down to that one event. Also, she's very distrusting of people until she's known them for a while and even then finds it hard to know how to be a "friend". She desperately wants to change this so that she can start to live a life, but she's not really holding out much hope of that, which also highlights her total and utter pessimism: she's not a "half empty" kinda gal, more a "the glass fell off the table and broke" kinda gal.

Abilities: Ninian is an accomplished writer, having started during therapy by writing anything and everything she was feeling as a way of letting go. Slowly, she began to shift her writing into fiction, using that as an outlet for her emotions instead. She'll write anything that happens to inspire her but she prefers the fantasy genre, since she's able to let her imagination run wild. She also has somewhat of a photographic memory and puts it to great use remembering exerpts of her favourite books and scenes from movies.

Weapons: Ninian hardly ever feels safe outside, so she carries with her a small folding pocket knife and two small pepper spray key rings at all times. She also keeps a baseball bat by her bed.

Folding knife


Pepper spray key rings

Prized Possessions: She treasures her books, many of which are first editions: she takes particularly good care of her first edition Lord of the Rings trilogy books.

Nina's Lord of the Rings books

Home(s): An apartment on, unbeknownst to her, Cole's side of town.

History: Ninian was the only child of Sarah and Roland Clancy, born in Vancouver. Growing up was not a pleasurable experience for Nina as it should be for children - ever since she can remember, the Clancy household was an incredibly volatile place with her jobless, drunk of a father lounging around the house all day while her mother, a nurse who had to work nightshifts, had not only her job to deal with but also the demands from her husband when she got back after what was almost always a horribly tiring shift. The friction between the two often built until suddenly a full blown argument would begin. Ninian was a casualty of their war, ignored and neglected.

As soon as she was old enough to, Nina was virtually left to fend for herself, as Sarah had to catch up on her sleep during the day and by now she had learned that Roland wasn't someone she could depend on for anything except making her life a misery. She would make and pack her own lunch, do her own laundry and get herself to and from school.

It wasn't unusual for Nina to visit the local library every day, and spend every minute that she could reading through all the books that she could get her hands on. She was such a frequent visitor that she was not only on first name basis with all of the librarians but was also allowed to help out from time to time, putting returned books away and finding books for people. Because of her love of reading, Nina did well in school despite the troubles she had at home. Her teachers were all well aware of the situation and helped as much as they could, for which Nina was grateful. Her ultimate dream would have been to continue on with education and hopefully major in English Literature but she was well aware that this would amount to nothing.

So life went on in it's monotony: Nina would wake up just as her mother returned from her shift, tired, aching and needing just to sleep; she would have her breakfast as round one of Sarah versus Roland started; she'd be going upstairs to pack her things and dress herself as that argument subsided; when she went back downstairs to pack her lunch round two would start, sometimes accentuated by the harsh sound of breaking glass (she still detests the noise to this day); her mother would be stomping upstairs as Nina left for school. When she returned home from school (having inevitably stopped off at the library for an hour or two first) she would get dinner ready as her father slept off his drunken stupor, feed herself, then lock herself in her room for the rest of the night. Neither of her parents seemed to notice her, and she much preferred it that way.

When Nina was 14 years of age the violence began. It had begun as the Clancy day normally did, with arguments and bickering. But Nina noticed that this time it was different: the argument was more intense and heated than normal because her mother had had a particularly bad day at work after some sort of mass accident. Nina dared to look into the living room, feeling more terrified than she normally did, and watched as her father raised a hand and slapped her mother so hard she fell to the floor. Nina was frozen to the spot, unable to stop looking at the scene before her. Roland caught a glimpse of Nina and started heading for her, breaking her momentary trance fast enough for Nina to be able to dash out of the door before he caught her.

She didn't have lunch that day.

When she finally plucked up the courage to go home, nothing had changed: Sarah had left for work and Roland was passed out on the easy chair, snoring. Life continued, though the violence soon became a part of the normal daily routine. Sarah was slapped around and Nina soon had to suffer the violence too, managing to get a scar across her abdomen from one of her father's drunken rages. Nina often wondered how her mother managed to explain the bruises and marks if they were ever inquired about but for the sake of her own sanity she pushed the thought to the back of her mind. In this house it was every man (or woman) for themselves.

That's why Nina wasn't shocked when, on her 17th birthday, she came home from school one day to find a note from her mother explaining how she's left, how she can't deal with this anymore, how she needed to go before her soul was well and truly crushed. She didn't blame her mother, but she, even to this day, holds a certain amount of bitterness and resentment towards her mother for leaving her behind and making her go alone through the situation she was so ready to escape.

Her dad asked where Sarah was and Nina answered. Before the young girl could escape Roland had grabbed her by the hair - she remembers thinking how fast he moved for a drunk old bastard whose liver was about to implode - and grabbed his shotgun. Fear made Nina stop struggling as she was dragged out the front door and began screaming his wife's name, much to the shock of some passers-by. Those same people called the police, fearing for the life of the girl who was now to be treated as a hostage. For the next seven hours Nina was held in the living room of the house she had come to hate, bound and gagged with a piece of duct-tape over her mouth. For seven hours she had to listen to her father crying and wailing about his life, how he needed her, how he missed her, how he wanted her to come home. Apparently Nina was just an added piece of baggage that came with being with Sarah Clancy.

Towards the end, a police officer was trying to talk the deranged man out of the room before he made things any worse for himself. Roland glanced at the door, then looked right at Nina and sighed, as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Then he smiled. It was a beautiful smile, as if he had suddenly just let go of everything that was making him so bitter and angry. Then he grabbed his shotgun and put the barrel to his face. Nina could only watch in silent horror as he pulled the trigger.

Momentarily deafened, she sat, mute, until the officers stormed in and took her out. Took her away. She didn't speak as she was taken to the cop car, nor did she speak when she saw them wheeling the covered body to the waiting ambulance. In fact, the only time she spoke was when she arrived at the station and saw one of the officers wearing a crucifix around his neck. Without really thinking she asked to borrow it then closed her eyes and muttered the Lord's prayer to herself. The officers within earshot bowed their heads and prayed with her, then comforted her as she broke down and wept, and wept, and wept. She cried for what seemed like an eternity, convinced the tears would never stop.

She spent the next few weeks at a shelter where she was able to collect her thoughts and decide what she would do. The police were unable to contact her mother and she was silently glad. She didn't want to have to deal with her anger towards her mother at this moment in time, if ever.

She was offered free counselling afterwards, which helped a little. The tears did stop, but she still suffers from regular nightmares and flashbacks and is very wary of people. Part of her counselling was writing her thoughts and feelings into a journal or diary, and not to hold back with what she felt. Finding this one of the better suggestions she has continued with this form of therapy, though now she is dabbling in writing fiction. She still doesn't trust anyone enough to show these works - they're intensely private - though she hopes to share them with someone someday.

Even though she hated her father for what he made her, she still mourns his death every year by lighting a candle and saying a prayer. She had scattered his ashes by the river he apparently used to go fishing at with his father but never really had a funeral so this was her way of saying goodbye and to say "I forgive you".

Before she left Vancouver for good she decided to drop in and say goodbye to the librarians and the men who rescued her. They were the first people she had ever felt some sort of positive connection with and would be the only people (indeed the only thing full stop) that she would miss. She lost contact with most of them after a month, but she appreciated the fact that they cared about her. She put her old house up for sale and settled any debts with the money she got from that and bought a car with the leftover.

Over the next 7 years she travelled south, never staying in one state for more than a year before moving onto the next. She managed to get along by taking on small jobs here and there, getting jobs as a waitress, shop clerk, and once she even tried working at a butcher's. Needless to say she didn't last a week in the last of the three. Eventually she got to LA and managed to get what she believes to be the best job ever: as Librarian at the LA public library. She's been in LA for a few years now and is starting to feel as if she could make a life for herself here: she has a job she loves, in a place where ties with her past can be well and truly severed. The nightmares still haunt her dreams but they're slowly ebbing away and she now hopes that she can rebuild herself so that she can make friends in whom she can trust.